So I lived my life in a dreamworld

For the rest of my days

Just you and me walking hand in hand

In a wishful memory

Oh, I guess that's all that it would ever be.

Wish I had a time machine

I could make myself go back

Until the day I was born

And I would live my life again

And rearrange it so that

I'll be yours from now on.

i dunno what i feel anymore.

i'm not sarah lee no more.

"Love is an ugly, terrible business practiced by fools.
It'd trample your heart and leave you bleeding on the floor.
And what does it get you in the end?
Nothing but a few incredible memories that you can't ever shake.
The truth is, there's gonna be other girls out there.
I mean, I hope.
But I'm never ever gonna get another first love.
That one is always gonna be her."

It's always that lousy feeling..

going home to a dark room, finding yourself all alone.

And when you dont drink you cant sleep?

I guess i should have drank more tonight.

Sigh.

I guess I felt responsible to take care of J since she was drunk.

Seeing the way people get totally wasted and do things they have no control over,

It really hurts me.

I really wanted to go all out, have a wild time today.

I wanted to dance like crazy.

I wanted to drink and get hell high.

I wanted to...

Somehow I held back.

Had a drink, and that was it.

The rest of the night it was just green tea..

Because I knew deep down I shouldn't do anything I wouldnt be proud of.

I wanna stay true. Because I still love you.

Maybe it's in wondering how you feel that makes me can't stop thinking about it.

I wanna sleep.

I wanna fall asleep.

I wanna fall into deep sleep.

but all i can do is lie awake and stare into the darkness.

Thoughts, please stay away. Leave me alone. Just for tonight.

I really need rest.

My eyes are getting smaller and smaller each day.

Maybe one day i wouldnt even be able to see no more.

If be in any case,

We can choose not to sleep,

Because the very next day cold hard reality is gonna grab you

and hit you down to the core,

I would never wanna sleep.

It's in every sleep that I dream of you,

It's in every glance i take in the dark, finding myself all alone.

It's in waking up to an empty space beside me.

Knowing you wont be there anymore.

The hardest part is in waking up every morning and remembering what you have been trying so hard to forget last night.

I'm afraid to sleep every night.

To tell you the truth, I haven't slept at all.